Cindy O’Brien, a fellow member of the Foothills Writer’s Guild has written and published a new book called The Broken Road. The book is a memoir about her life as a young teen, who had just experienced the death of her mother to cancer, and the events that took place after her mother’s death. The book deals with themes of grief, anger, abuse, and abandonment and how to turn it around when you feel it crushing you. Cindy tells about how she never really dealt with the events following the death of her mother until her own daughter becomes a teenager. When her memories are triggered, she starts recalling the abuse she suffered. Cindy O’Brien’s story is one of forgiveness and healing that I am sure others need to read.
I was a teacher for seventeen years. In that time, I witnessed what abuse and trauma can do to a child. My heart ached for Cindy as I read her words. She is my age now, and to look at her you would think her life has been perfect. She is a beautiful lady with a beautiful family. Her story taught me that lots of people are living with scars of the past. Most people have work to do to heal and handle the pain that past relationships may have dealt them. Her story can teach others about the path to recovery, which I think is the most important message. How to overcome whatever past scars you have and work toward healing.
Cindy also writes a blog, and in a recent blog post she has detailed some steps that might help others who are suffering. The following came from her most recent post on her My Little Corner blog.
https://cindyobrien78.blogspot.com/.
“1. Don’t run from your trauma. Face it head on.
2. Find a qualified, Christian counselor. Don’t be afraid to share your junk. They are equipped to handle your pain.
3. Allow yourself to grieve the trauma.
4. Allow the words of scripture to speak into your pain and change your mindset.
5. Find margin in your life. This is not the time to load your schedule with activities. A sabbatical may be necessary. You are worth it.
6. Surround yourself with family and friends who will pray for you, and with you, during this pivotal time in your life. It’s hard work and you can’t do it alone.
7. Remove anyone from your life who doesn’t support your journey. You will recognize who they are by the way they communicate with you.
8. Do something tangible along the way to encourage the healing process. I made a photo album of my mom’s life. It’s a visual reminder of what an incredible woman she was and helps me remember how much she loved me. A part of me grieved with every photo and memory.”
I am so thankful for Cindy and her book. I really think it could help others. Below is a question-and-answer segment with Cindy O’Brien about the book.
Q: What inspired you to write The Broken Road, and when did you know it was time to share your story publicly?
A: I began counseling at about the same time I came “out of the closet” as a writer. I wanted to share the miraculous way God healed the relationship with my dad. As I grew stronger with counseling, I knew I wanted to share my story. I wrote off and on from 2013 until right before Covid hit. I spoke to two professional writers, both of which I respected. However, they gave me conflicting information. I wasn’t ready either. My story was still unfolding and there was no end in sight. Both of them said my story needed to be told. I became confused and discouraged about their approach to how I shared my story. Because of that, I stopped writing altogether. Poetry and my blog became my focus. In the fall of 2024, I took a class at my church from Dr. Bruce Wilkinson, author of the famous book, Prayer of Jabez. He asked the question, “What is one thing God has told you to do that you haven’t done?” I knew immediately it was finishing my book. That was in the last part of August. On September 3, 2024, as I sat in the pick-up line waiting for my grandson, I opened a new document on my laptop and started over. I discarded about 40,000-50,000 words, and wrote from my heart, the way it felt genuine to me. The time was finally right to tell the story of how God delivered me from decades of secrets, shame, abuse, abandonment, and self-hate.
Q: I love the symbolism of the title, The Broken Road. Was choosing a title hard, or did it come naturally with the content of your story?
A: The title came naturally. I’d had a couple of working titles, but as I wrote I kept hearing “journey” in my head. I was listening to the radio and heard the song by Rascal Flatts called Bless the Broken Road. The words of that song touched me deeply. It wasn’t the lover I was longing for but the truest form of love in Jesus that I wanted to return to.
Q: Writing about trauma is never easy. What was the most difficult part of putting your experiences into words?
A: I cried buckets of tears sitting in my car in that pick-up line. The hardest part was reliving my brokenness again through words and then picturing my children reading the details of my trauma. It was also difficult to share details without being graphic. I wanted the reader to feel the pain more than seeing the images in their head.
Q: Your book is one of the most real and heartbreaking stories that I have read in a long time. Many women have suffered traumas or abuse and stayed silent. What advice would you give to anyone who has experienced the effects of childhood trauma later in life or flashbacks like you had?
A: I would tell them to get counseling first and foremost. Speak your pain and trauma out loud in the presence of a caring, qualified professional, preferably a Christian counselor. Breaking the spell of silence was my first step to freedom. I would also tell them to be gentle with themselves and not be afraid of what people think. No one but God knows the details of pain, trauma, self-hate, condemnation, and He loves you with perfect love. Surround yourself with family and friends who love you. Read scripture that speaks truth over you, not lies from the evil one. There may be people you have to distance yourself from, even close family members who tear you down instead of building you up.
Q: Many survivors struggle with finding their voice. What advice would you give to someone who wants to share their story but feels afraid to start?
A: Start small. Find a group of women you trust, even two or three. Speak your pain out loud. Write in a journal. Sometimes writing helps clarify your feelings. I wrote a timeline of my life several years ago. It helped me to recognize how one trauma led to another and how I responded to each. It helped me see that I was just a child.
Q: It took you twelve years to write the book. How did writing it help you heal? And what do you want to tell anyone who wants to write?
A: Even though I worked on the book for all those years, once I started over in September of 2024, I finished it in early 2025. When I started over, I was several years on the other side of healing, and the words came so quickly I couldn’t keep up. It was like a well overflowing with pain, then gratitude, then thanksgiving. Writing helped me pour out my pain onto the page, naming it what it was, and then realizing I didn’t have to live with the bondage to my past. God freed me from that bondage. I would strongly encourage anyone struggling with past trauma to write how it makes them feel. Name each trauma and how it affected them. What poor choices did they make that led to more bondage because of the original sin against them. I can go back to the beginning of my trauma and see where and why I made poor choices. I blamed myself more than anyone else. I’ve learned to let that go and put the blame where it deserved to be put.
Q: I love how your book takes us on a lifelong journey. In the end, you say it isn’t intended to be a tell-all biography. Do you have other stories from your life that you hope to share one day? What is next for you in writing?
A: I’m pondering a book about infertility and adoption. I also have blog posts that could be put into book form. I wrote many devotional posts as I was going through counseling, as well as family stories that helped in grieving my mother.
Q: From reading your story, it is very clear that your faith played a big role in your healing. What would you like to share about your faith in Jesus for those that don’t know him?
A: Without my faith in Jesus, I would still be that scared and scarred little girl living in a woman’s body. He gave me courage to tell my story, and he comforted me as I cried remembering the worst of it. I’ve learned to trust His plan for my life, and I’ve learned that true healing comes from Him. He changed the way I saw myself. I’m no longer a broken little girl who felt like nobody loved her. As the scripture I used at the end of my book says, “But you, O Lord, are a shield about me, my glory and the lifter of my head. I cried aloud to the Lord, and He answered me from His holy hill. I lay down and slept I woke again for the Lord sustained me. Psalm 3:3-5 ESV
Q: How has writing this book changed your perspective — on yourself, on your past, or on forgiveness?
A: I fully believe we carry too much pain because we don’t forgive those who hurt us. This book has given me freedom. I shared my deepest pain, regrets, trauma, disappointments and the weight of carrying that in secret and shame is gone. I can hold my head up and hopefully help someone else in pain. I’ve accepted my past as it is: imperfectly mine. I’ve finally laid my mother to rest and know I’ll see her again someday. I miss my dad terribly and wish I could hear him say, “awe shucks,” one more time. That’s why I dedicated the book to them. They did the very best they could under excruciating circumstances with my mom’s illness and eventual death. Writing this book has helped me wrap my arms around my younger self. It helped me to grieve over all I lost and celebrate all I had. I’ve also learned to embrace today and celebrate how far God has brought me. He gets all the glory now and forever.
Q: Many people are in pain or have mental issues and they avoid therapy, or have never tried it. Do you think your healing could have taken place without it?
A: Absolutely not. I was not equipped to deal with the trauma on my own. My first counselor, Charles, told me I had twelve major trauma issues. It was hard work, some of the hardest work I’ve ever done. Without professional help, I would’ve given up
Q: As a survivor, and someone who has done the work to get better, any final words you want to share?
A: Don’t be afraid. If you are a believer in Christ, He will walk every step of the way with you. You are never alone. I felt His presence so many times. As I was writing, He’d bring things to my mind, constantly reminding me I was loved.
Q: Memoirs often walk a fine line between vulnerability and strength. How did you find that balance in your storytelling?
A: I wrote from my heart. I wanted to be honest and allow the reader to understand my pain. I also know that someone will read my book and identify a similar experience. I wanted her to know that what was meant to destroy me did not win. Words are powerful tools and I wanted to be vulnerable to show that God can heal anything and anyone.
Q: Now that The Broken Road is out in the world, what’s next for you — more writing, speaking engagements, or new projects?
A: I would love to do some speaking, particularly to women’s groups. I want to give my book to those in need. I have no goal of making money, I just want to help someone who is like I was. I’d love to compile my blog posts into a devotional. As I mentioned above, a book about infertility and adoption is another interest. We have a beautiful story of how God gave us our two children, Andy, almost 39, and Bailey, 38 yrs. old, from Guatemala.
Q: What do you hope your legacy will be as a survivor, an author, and an advocate for others?
A: My greatest legacy would be that I loved fiercely. I want to be known for my faith, my kindness, and for my grandchildren, that I loved them unconditionally. As an author, I’d like to be known for writing works that speak to the heart of brokenness and the joy found in a life with Jesus. I want my grandchildren to one day know the courage it took to write my story. They’re too young now to read it, but I hope that one day they’ll understand why I loved them so deeply and sacrificed my time and energy to be with them. I want my children to know I loved them enough to get the help I needed so I could be fully present for their families.
Q: If you could speak directly to your younger self — or to a child who feels broken right now — what would you tell them?
A: Dear Cindy or Dear child: You don’t have to carry the burden of your past. True healing is waiting for you, all you need to do is use your God given voice and ask for it. Take that first step to a beautiful life free from shame, guilt, and grief. You are worth fighting for. When it seems the darkest, Jesus is there, waiting to heal your brokenness. He will always be with you and will never fail you.
Q: Is there anything else that you would like to tell the readers that I didn’t ask about?
A: I’m honored that you picked up my book. Using your time to read my story is the reader’s gift to me. I didn’t realize how powerful that would be for me, humbling too! I was terrified to hit “publish,” but once I did, all my fear was gone. I knew I’d been obedient to what God told me to do all those years ago.
To read Cindy O’Brien’s, The Broken Road-A Journey To Healing, it can be found on Amazon.com
Also, if you or someone you know is in need of help, the following agencies may be able to help you or direct you to help.
In South Carolina to report suspected abuse of children the number to call is 1-888-CARE4US or 1-888-227-3487.
If you have experienced and are the victim of abuse, you might try the following website for information available to help. https://sc.gov/residents/protecting-your-safety/victims-rights-and-services.
Also, the https://www.scvan.org/nonprofit. Has several agencies and support groups on their site that could help.
In Greenville, the Julie Valentine Center has adult survivors classes. Their website – https://www.julievalentinecenter.org/adult-therapy-and-survivor-support-groups.html or call 864.331.0560 .